When Has God NOT Supported You?

All I have to do is remember with gratitude

A week or so ago I woke up with impending doom. You know the feeling, I'm sure. If you're like me, you don't always know what triggers the sense of everything's awful or I'm afraid! But sometimes you do.

In my case I was feeling broke again.

A writing contract I was expecting hadn't come through and I didn't know why or when or even if. But the cause can be almost anything, and sometimes we never know the cause.

Gratitude usually works

I started a gratitude list, which almost always returns me to some sort of sanity, but in the middle of it, I really blew up.

So I called a friend. Not to whine about the missing contract, but to confess I had moved from faith to fear. She knows me well, and after I had dumped my saga, she said quietly, "Anne, has there ever been a time when God hasn't supported you?"

Her gentle tone and powerful word brought me up short. Taking a deep breath I admitted that God had gotten me this far, even though I didn't always recognize it.

Remembering

When I got off the phone, I took some time and really looked at my life. Not as an Inventory, just sort of paging through my memories.

I remembered how I'd found the studio with the garden I live in - after "getting lost" looking for another advertised rental. God in action for sure.

God was certainly sitting on my shoulder while I was drinking and all through my sobriety. God's work in my life shows up in my work, my adult kids and my three grandkids, and in the fact my car is paid for and that I've had fabulous travel adventures and good friends... the list goes on and on.

Our 11th Step tells us we are to "improve our conscious contact" and that's what my friend reminded me of - just to notice that, no matter how it seems in any particular moment, God has been supporting me all along.

Love, peace and abundance,