Exploring Your Spirit

Finding the God of YOUR Understanding

One of the great gifts of the 12 Step Program is that it allows us to explore what a Higher Power means to us. Of course, that freedom can also seem like a problem at first.

When I first got sober and turned my "will and my live over" to the God of my understanding, my understanding was almost nil. I had no idea what Spirit wanted from or for me, nor did I know how to find out. I remember telling my sponsor, "I wish God would write on the wall!"

I know I was facing some decision, although I don't remember the issue. I do remember an agonizing sense of confusion. I also remember my sponsor's answer:

God does write on walls

"God does 'write on walls;' you're just not looking in the right place."

Slowly I began to explore what the concept of God meant and mean to me. At one point I joined a Church of Religious Science which put me in touch with the idea that we are all an individualized expression of Spirit and responsible for ourselves and to each other.

I took part in a weekend exploring American Indian traditions and discovered that I wasn't the only one who sensed way more than I can see. That weekend also taught me I can create my own ritual as well as participate in those others create.

I've attended Quaker meetings and watched as those moved by Spirit speak; I've felt shivers in a church when someone spoke in tongues.

Carl Jung

After reading many of psychologist Carl Jung's books, I asked for a vision of God and was a mental picture of an infinitely lovely and huge diamond with each person on the planet, including me, being a facet. Later I discovered it was fairly common.

Early on I tried and tried to sit and meditate, to no avail, then one day recognized I was often meditating when I took a long, hot, relaxing shower. Since then I've experiment more successfully with a variety of meditation techniques.

The last 50 days or so, I've been participating in a teleconference call called "Good Vibrations." (Email me if you want information on this-it's free) Each morning we have a guided mediation, a reading and then share the minor and major miracles that happen in our lives. Just slowing down enough to notice those good things that happen is an awakening all on its own!

Our Program is indeed Spirit filled, however you want to define that. The secret is to open up, and be willing to explore and discover how Spirit, or your Higher Power, wants to express through you.

Love, peace and abundance,