These
meetings are often filled with jargon; you may hear people saying how
different they are from 'normies' or other separating language. Some of
the typical comments include:
-
I'm just a sick
(name your addiction) trying to get better.
-
If I knew I were
going to die tomorrow, I'd have a drink tonight.
-
Work is so hard;
they are all normies and don't understand me at all.
-
I'm proud to say
all my friends are in Program!
Watch the jargon
None
of these comments reflect the healing and balance working the 12 Steps
can give us.
On
the other hand, there are meetings that are vibrant with recovery in its
fullest sense. Usually these groups will have members ranging from the
rawest newcomer to the most experienced old timer.
Vibrant
recovery
The
sharing in these meetings is grounded in the Steps and in results
members get from working the Steps. Typical comments include:
-
I'm a recovered
(name your addiction).
-
I truly have no
desire to practice my addiction any more.
-
Work is hard which
makes it a challenge and I've discovered several people who want to
help me do a better job.
-
The world is a big,
exciting place and now I have all sorts of supportive friends.
We do
have a choice about what we share and how we share it. When we have some
time in recovery it's often possible to frame even difficult problems in
ways that point to or ask for a Step-based solution.
Sometimes,
we can help a meeting that's stuck get unstuck simply by the way we
share. Even if the meeting doesn't shift, we're likely to be approached
by others who like our style afterwards.
There
are, however, some groups that refuse to shift, that seem to love their
misery and defeatism. Our best bet in these situations is to switch to
another meeting where solutions are welcome. And, as is sometimes true,
such a meeting doesn't exist, there's no reason in the world not to
start one.
Love, peace and
abundance,
