Admitting we are addicted, as we do in the
First Step is also our first effort at becoming
responsible people. Steps Four,
Five,
Eight, Nine,
and Twelve help us continue that growth.
As
we move toward becoming recovered, taking responsibility becomes a way of life
and part of our spiritual discipline.
But
there's a huge difference between taking responsibility and blaming ourselves.
For
example, I lost a part time job recently. The pay was excellent and I got to
work at home learning grant writing for a local theater... I loved the idea of
the job and really liked the people. But almost from the beginning it wasn't
working.
I must admit that my
first knee jerk reaction to the job's end was that it was all my fault.
That part of me that still wants to beat me up started into a litany of
self-blame.
Fortunately I've learned
how to shut that negative part of me up! I took a deep breath and really
looked at what had happened--all of it. I acknowledged that I hadn't asked for
help as often as I might have, but I also acknowledged that there were some
real communication problems in the organization itself.
In
other words, I reached for and found a balance--taking responsibility but not
moving into destructive self-blame.
For
the truth is most, if not all, situations are not all one way or the other,
but some sort of combination. Looking for and accepting the whole truth moves
us toward balance and serenity.
Love, peace and
abundance,
