Sure, our 11th Tradition states Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and film.
That doesn’t mean, as some would have you believe, that’ you’ve got to hide your membership in a 12 Step group from everyone and under all conditions except at meetings.
We’re not supposed to sit quietly by while someone else suffers when, with a quiet mention of our own recovery might make a huge positive difference to them.
The trick, of course, is in how you do it. Keep these things in mind and you’ll do just fine:
Don’t put your recovery in jeopardy. If you’re not pretty solid in your recovery you may want to wait until you are. I remember trying to carry the message to a woman in a hospital. She was uninterested and I found myself wanting to get drunk. That’s not the point and I waited quite awhile before I did more individual 12 Step work.
reak your anonymity to someone at work if it’s going to put your job in jeopardy. This could happen if the person you try to help blabs about your efforts. On the other hand, most employers are fairly knowledgeable about addiction and recovery, at least in a general way.
Don’t put the person you’re trying to help in jeopardy either. Be careful not to cause the person you want to help problems on the job either. Use common sense.
Wait until you and your prospect are alone and will have time to talk a bit. You’re more likely to have success if you talk with your prospect in private, and at a time when they two of you have time to chat a bit. At a coffee break or even over lunch might work. So might right after work, or if you both arrive early, before work.
Keep it simple. Keep your approach simple. Say something like “… it may not be any of my business, but I wondered if I told you I used to (name the addiction) and now I don’t would interest you?” Leave lots of space for them to respond.
Have no expectations. Just like any 12th Step work, this is more about you being willing to be of service than about your prospect immediately deciding to follow the 12th Step path. Be sure you have no expectations that they will be interested in what you share.
Consider letting your manager know you’re in recovery. Depending on the kind of work you do and the people around you, you may want to let your manager know you’re in recovery and that you’re willing to speak to people individually about your story. I’ve done this and it’s been appreciated.
There is, of course, no requirement that you break your anonymity at work or anyplace else. But carrying the message is one of the best ways to be of service. Consider it carefully and even talk it over with your sponsor before you try talking to someone in your work place. On the other hand, it can be one of the more satisfying experiences in recovery.
How do you carry the message?
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